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What I Do All Day

Sometimes, as I settle into bed at night I think, What did I do all day? Two years ago, when I had a full-time job, I still did laundry. I made dinner. I freelanced in addition to my full-time work. I went out with friends and watched TV and read and kept the bathroom clean. So how is it possible that much of that now never gets done even though I’m home all day?

And then I remember. Today, I walked down the stairs.

For most people, walking down stairs is a non-think act that takes less than 30 seconds. Granted, our stairs our steep. There are 15 of them. But with a toddler who is very much in the “I can do it” stage, walking down stairs is an activity. An event. And is just a small example of why I can’t close the lid of our laundry basket. I’ll illustrate this at-least-10-times-a-day event for you here.

Me: “Sophie, we have to go downstairs. Do you want me to carry you or do you want to walk?”

Sophie: “No! I want to walk! I can do it!”

I position myself in front of her. As I said, our stairs are steep. And she still has a tendency to slip—especially when wearing footed, fuzzy pjs.

Me: “Don’t you think it would be easier if you sat down?”

Sophie: “No! I want to walk.”

Me: “OK, well, be careful.”

She points to the handrail.

Sophie: “What’s that?”

Me: “It’s the handrail.”

Sophie: “It’s too high! I can’t reach it.”

Me: “I know. You will eventually. For now, just put your hand on the wall.”

She points to the metal brace that connects the handrail to the wall.

Sophie: “What’s that?”

Me: “It’s a metal brace that connects the handrail to the wall.”

Sophie: “What’s that?”

Me: “The handrail. Can you please take a step?”

She finally takes a step.

Me: “Good girl! OK, take another.”

Sophie: “Handrail. That’s handrail. I can’t reach it.”

Me: “I know. Just hold onto the wall.”

Sophie: “Tucker!”

Me: “Tucker’s napping. He’ll come down later.”

Sophie: “Tucker!”

Me: “Sophie, come on, we have to go downstairs. Please take another step. Do you want me to carry you?”

Sophie: “No, Mom! No. I can do it.”

Me: “OK, well, take a step.”

She takes a few more steps.

Sophie: “I can do it, Mom!”

Me: “I know! And you’re doing such a good job. Now keep walking.”

She stops. And points to a piece of fuzz.

Sophie: “Uh oh.”

Me: “It’s just fuzz, Sophie, I’ll vacuum it up later.”

Sophie: “Messy. I clean it.”

Me: “No, Sophie, you don’t have to clean it. It’s OK.”

Sophie: “No, I get it!”

Me: “No, Sophie, you’re on the stairs. Concentrate.”

Sophie: “I get it!”

Me: “Here, I’ll get it for you. See? All gone. Now please keep walking down the steps.”

She takes a few more steps. And then sees a pair of my shoes on the steps. And stops.

Sophie: “Mama’s shoes?”

Me: “Yes, those are my shoes.”

She points to my slippers, which I’m wearing.

Sophie: “Mama’s shoes?”

Me: “Yes, Mama’s shoes, too. Now please keep walking.”

She points to her own shoes.

Sophie: “Sophie’s shoes?”

Me: “Yes, those are your shoes. Keep walking.”

She takes a few more steps. And stops. And touches her hair.

Sophie: “Haircut?”

Me: “Yes, Sophie, you got your haircut.”

Sophie: “Nicholena cut it.”

Me: “Yes, Sophie, Nicholena cut it. Please keep walking.”

Sophie: “I sat in chair!”

Me: “Yes. And someday you’ll get your haircut again. Just a few more steps, Sophie. Come on. Concentrate.”

She points to the handrail.

Sophie: “I can’t reach it.”

Me: “No, you can’t reach it. Not yet. Keep walking.”

Sophie: “Tucker!”

Me: “Tucker’s napping, Sophie. And it’s too much for all three of us to be on the stairs at once. Now please keep walking.”

Sophie: “Tucker!”

Me: “Sophie, concentrate! Keep walking.”

She points to the light switch.

Sophie: “Light! I want to turn on the light!”

Me: “Sophie, we’re almost done. We don’t need to turn on the light.”

Sophie: “I want to turn on the light!”

Me: “Look, just two more steps. Come on. I know you can do it.”

Sophie: “Light! Light! I want to turn on the light!”

We turn the light on. We turn the light off. She moves to the other side of the steps. Why? Who knows. But she does it every time. Finally, she reaches bottom.

Sophie: “I did it!”

Me (with every last ounce of patience I have): “Yes, you did it. Good job.”

“Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet.” —Jean Jacques Rousseau

Related posts:

  1. She Walks!
This entry was written by kara, posted on February 10, 2010 at 4:09 pm, filed under Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink. Follow any comments here with the RSS feed for this post. Post a comment or leave a trackback: Trackback URL.
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  • Elizabeth

    Great story!

  • Anonymous

    What is your kid retarded? Pick the kid up and bring em down so you can get on with your day.

  • Anonymous

    Anonymous-You clearly are retarded for making a comment like that.
    Magie

  • S. Baker

    This makes me laugh! Although it takes tons of time, it's these moments that you will cherish in the future. What a wonderful mother you are for teaching your daughter patience as well as allowing her little mind to grow as she asks questions and gets answers instead of getting rushed away!

  • Danielle

    What a great mom you are! (Andy, I'm sure you're great too!) I'm sure your mom would say the same thing, but as a teacher I can always tell the kids who had parents like you vs. the kids who had parents that did everything for them. I can see Sophie being one of the teacher's favorites one day!

  • Matt

    It must take a lot of courage for that loser to insult a child, much less under the cover of anonymity. Very impressive.

    Great writing, Kara!

    -MATTHEW DAVENPORT

  • Wendy

    First of all, Kara…this was so cute and awesome!!! I loved the whole conversation and back and forth with her. It reminds me of life in our house. :)

    To the anonymous idiot…seriously? You are apparently a coward and a horrible parent. Your kids are the ones that are missing out on learning and living in a patient and loving environment.

    Don't let that person get you down, Kara. We all love your Sophie stories and you!!

  • gary gebhart

    Kara, the amount of learning that took place in your story is amazing. Sophine learned and you learned.

    Anonymous walked down the stairs, learned nothing, and is still stupid.

    Love, Dad and Grandpa Gebhart

    To Anonymous: Stay anonymous to yourself and the world.

  • Josephine

    Touching. Thank you for sharing. I think we stay-at-home parents have heaps of stories just like these. Kudos for writing it down.
    P.S. What a great talker you have!
    P.P.S. Anonymous, grow up.

  • tjenkins

    Anonymous walked down the stairs, learned nothing, and is still stupid. — that is the best comment EVER!

    Kara — this made me laugh so much because this is just what we go through with Owen on the way up and the way down — except of course he doesn't have nearly the vocabulary that Sophie does yet! but Marley has to always be with us, if there is a speck of anything on the stairs it needs investigating — the whole thing summed up our travels on the stairs and just cracked me up.

    I honestly can't believe that someone takes the time to read your amazing blog and then posts the most ridiculous comment ever… I mean really….they have nothing better to do?! and I agree with a previous poster, if they are parents…god help their children.

    Trista

  • Anonymous

    I howled through the whole story! That was great.
    Love, Aunt Chris

  • Lauren

    Thanks for this, Kara. I spent what seemed like an eternity yesterday jiggling the butterflies on Finn's play gym so he wouldn't feel so frustrated about not being able to reach them yet. Glad I'm not the only type-A editor re-learning patience from mommyhood! You've given me more moral support in this story than I can express. (((HUG)))

  • gary gebhart

    Kara, the amount of learning that took place in your story is amazing. Sophie learned and you learned.

    Anonymous walked down the stairs, learned nothing, and is still stupid.

    Love, Dad and Grandpa Gebhart

    To Anonymous: Stay anonymous to yourself and the world.

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